Mean People/Bullies

Here is something I do not understand. Why people have to be so mean. I was just on facebook and I was looking at something someone posted and it was a math question with 4 possible answers and you are suppose to guess the right one. Everyone was guessing different possibilities depending upon how they did the math problem. This link has thousands of comments on it and every once and a while some jackass has to say something mean. One of the comments was; "Go back to elementary school you idiots the answer is 50". Another comment was "get a real life".

Are these comments really necessary? Why do people feel the need to say stupid stuff like that to people whom they most likely do not even know?

How can someone go on a link and type for all the others to get a life when they are on the same thing...?

I wish people would just let others do what they would like without someone saying something rude. The world would be such a better place even. Bullies.

I am glad that schools have started doing something about preventing bulling and/or are doing something about those who are bulling others. I remember high school and it was not the best time. Kids always have to make others feel like they are nothing and I just never understood why. I always hated that saying, "sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me." Why on earth  are we taught that phrase. The words that your peers say are more painful than broken bones, especially since they tend to stay with a person a whole lot longer than a broken bone.

My friends and I were always being made of fun of for some reason or another and I could never understand why. Why do teenagers, or people of any age, feel the need to make people feel bad about themselves? How does that make someone feel better about themselves?

Teenagers judge their peers way too often, and most of the time it is on the most ridiculous things. The common thing I was always teased about were my clothes. They were never "cool" enough because my family didn't spend $80 on a pair of jeans. At first it didn't bother me because I at least had clothes and I had something better than cool clothes. My family owned and still owns quite a lot of horses. They were more important to me than expensive clothes. Unlike most kids in my class I had the pleasure of having my own horse, which meant more than being part of a group that seemed to judge everyone on everything that they did or said. After a while of hearing all the crap that people were saying it started to get to me. I became worried about everything I said or did and what I wore.

However, I realized that no matter what I would never be part of the "cool" kids. Mostly because I didn't want to be because they stood for everything I was against. I never liked judging people and I have never thought that I have the right to judge others either. The other reason is because they would never stop judging me based on everything I did or said, even the past things. Kids always seem to bring up things that happened in the past to make other's lives miserable in some way or another.

The few friends I had in high school were awesome and I knew that if I just waited until I was done with high school and moved on to college that I wouldn't have to deal with quite as much ridicule. Thankfully that is very much true. However, there are college students who seem to think they are still in high school and tend to judge those around them still. Luckily, most students grow up and realize that it is stupid to make fun of others, yet some folks never grow up and tend to judge others throughout the rest of their lives. Sad.

I am glad that I am perfectly happy without needing to judge other peoples' actions. I just wish everyone felt the same way.

Today is a very special day. 7 years ago today I had a stem cell transplant to rid my body of leukemia cancer cells, which fortunately for me, worked. It wasn't the easiest thing and complications from the procedure forced changes in my life forever. What were those changes you may ask? Well, I guess you will just have to stay tuned. That is how you keep people coming back right? Intrigue... Although it may not be enough for a majority of people.

I have always wanted to write a book about my experience with cancer. Not because I want people to know everything but because I think it could help some out, especially those who are going through similar situations. When I was sick I never knew what to expect or what was to come and that scared me more than having cancer. The uncertainty. The thing that helped me out the most was getting to know others who were going through the same/similar thing. There were some that had already gone through some of the procedures and had received the drugs so they knew some of the side effects and could tell me what they experienced and what could happen. This helped more than what the doctors told me since they made everything seem like it could happen but doesn’t happen to everyone.

A lot of things happened during my treatment and some of it I can’t remember but I often have flashbacks of those times showing me what I once had forgotten.

The thing is, I don’t know how I would start out my book. Maybe I should just start writing one day and go from there…  It would at least give me something and I can always arrange things as I see fit later.

I think what most deters me from writing is knowing that I could never write a perfect paper. I always had spelling and grammar mistakes. I would hate to write a whole bunch of stuff just to know how crappy my grammar is.

Maybe I am just too scared. Scared of writing it and finding out that no one actually cares to read it. I wonder if all writers have that initial fear? How do you work through it? Just do it and put it out there and see the results and reviews?

I think wanting to help people get through the difficult time of going through treatments for cancer is what led me to want to become a social worker. However, I really do not want to live in a big city. I just wish I would have transferred to a school where I could get my bachelors of social work instead of needing to go to grad school. I am scared to spend even more money on school loans. However, I feel that if I keep waiting to find a job with my current degree I will never have a career.

I keep letting fear stop me from doing what I want. That is silly. I just need to put my fear aside and go for it.